


inhale the future, exhale the past

by grootmorning



Category: The Gifted (TV 2017)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Clarice kicks ass and can take care of herself (mostly), Eclaris (side), Everyone else is just placing bets on them tbh, F/M, John has a really nice broad chest fit for deep breathing exercises, Marcos Diaz/Lorna Dance (side relationship), gym!AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-02
Updated: 2018-12-18
Packaged: 2019-02-07 01:35:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12830532
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grootmorning/pseuds/grootmorning
Summary: gym!AU. What do a boxing trainer and a yoga instructor have in common? They're both very attractive and attracted to each other.





	1. one.

**Author's Note:**

> so this fic was inspired by this [gifset](http://ltfrankcastle.tumblr.com/post/167994409697/19-thunderbird-edits) of john deep breathing, and it spawned a monster of an au, sorry not sorry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> so he was a friend of a friend, maybe he could become her friend too

Clarice took one look inside the yoga studio and promptly walked into a wall. The towels in her arms fell spectacularly in an undignified heap and she clutched at her head, groaning.

"That was amazing, do it again," Lorna drawled from when she was leaning against the counter. She flipped through the brochures lazily, stacking them up.

Clarice hissed as she prodded at her forehead. That was going to swell and possibly bruise. Dropping to her knees, she sighed and began picking up the towels. She was going to have to get them laundered again. It was her fault. 

"Gonna tell me why you decided to take a header into the wall?"

"Maybe," Clarice struggled to get to her feet, nodding gratefully as Lorna took some of the towels. "Who in the hell is  _that?_ "

Lorna followed her eye line into the yoga studio. She snorted understandingly, "That's John."

"Helpful, very helpful," Clarice trailed after Lorna as she strode to the staff area. She eyed the man in the studio currently in the middle of demonstrating a warrior pose, a light sheen of perspiration covering his forehead, before sighing again and quickening her pace to catch up with Lorna. "John who?"

"John, the new yoga instructor."

"Lorna!" Clarice whined. They dumped the towels into the huge washing machine they kept at the back of the gym and Lorna kicked the door shut, jabbing at the buttons with her ring clad fingers to start the cycle. "You obviously know who he is, won't you share with the class?"

"Do I get anything out of it?" Lorna eyed her, obviously enjoying this.Lorna was having fun. Clarice always had the feeling that Lorna would slaughter them all in their sleep if she had to, save for Marcos. But she knew that the girl was a fiercely loyal friend. After two years working at this gym and six months of trying to become friends with her, she knew that this loyalty was hard earned. And she was proud to have it.

"I'll buy you a smoothie, any one you want," Clarice shrugged. Their juice bar was decently priced anyway, it was no skin off her back. She flicked her purple hair out of her eyes, huffing at Lorna, who was already on the verge of laughing.

"Offer accepted," Lorna tugged her own green hair into a ponytail. "His name is John Proudstar. Thank you for the smoothie!" She called as she swept out of the room.

"Lorna, that's not what I meant when I said tell me who he is! Lorna, do not lock me in the laundry room!"

-

John Proudstar, as Clarice discovered, was the newly transferred yoga instructor from another branch of their gym, Underground. Demand in their area had soared recently and management was adding to their roster to alleviate the burden on current staff. Marcos had of course, lobbied for his best friend to transfer to their gym. Clarice didn't know if she wanted to throttle him or hug him. Although, to be fair, if she did hug him, she would be the one getting throttled by Lorna.

"John Proudstar," he'd grinned as he held out his hand for her to shake.

Clarice mentally willed the flush on her face to go down as she took his hand, shaking it briefly before dropping it, "Clarice. Welcome to our tiny branch."

"I don't think I would have been transferred here if you guys were tiny," his smile was easy. It was at this point that Clarice knew she was a goner. "I'm sure you guys are doing great around here."

"Don't listen to her, bro, they have me as a manager. Our branch is awesome," Marcos announced, dragging Lorna over with him.

John punched her in the shoulder gently and she kicked him in the shins. Clarice watched the easy camaraderie the three of them had with something akin to jealousy. 

"So what do you teach?"

"Boxing, and I'm a general gym instructor, when they need me," Clarice nodded, crossing her arms awkwardly in front of her. Damn, he was really attractive up close. His hair was falling out of the small bun he'd tied it back into and into his face, and she never wanted to brush anyone's hair out of their face more. She clenched her fists to resist the urge.

"That sounds awesome," John grinned. Clarice suddenly felt like her job was the most interesting job in the world.

"Yeah, not everybody does yoga like you, dude."

"Yoga's difficult and you know it," John jabbed Marcos in the gut in retaliation for the hair ruffle and it turned into a little scuffle that Lorna had to step between. She looked tiny between the two men. "Don't make me tell everybody about the time you tried to do a headstand and fell on your face."

"You did not!" Lorna whirled around to face her boyfriend. "You told me you broke your nose when some dick was waving around dumbbells in the gym."

Marcos glared at John, hands curling in the air to throttle him as John ducked, laughing.

Clarice clapped her hands excitedly, "This I gotta hear."

"I have many stories, each better than the last," John told them as he slung a friendly arm around Lorna and beckoned for Clarice to come along. "Marcos will regret the day he asked management to transfer me here."

"Marcos regrets the day he made friends with you on the swing set," Marcos muttered under his breath.

"You were crying and had no friends."

"Dude! Enough!"

-

"Lauren, switch shifts with me," Clarice begged, a week into John's transfer to their gym.

Lauren looked at her confusedly, dropping her bag off behind the staff counter, "Didn't you beg me to switch just a week ago? I thought you wanted this shift in particular."

Lorna snickered.

Clarice shot her a furious glare, before turning back to the lost teenager, "Please, Lauren. I'll take any class or customer that you don't want to take, any, within the next week."

"But I don't understand," Lauren cocked her head to the side. "Why don't you - ohhhh."

Clarice closed her eyes in mild shame, knowing that Lauren had looked past her into the yoga studio. The identical grins on both Lauren's and Lorna's face were unbearable to look at.

Whoever invented hot yoga should be shot. 

John stepped to the door to open it and get some cool air into the studio. He waved, "Hey guys."

"Hey John," the two girls chorused, still grinning at Clarice.

"Hey Clarice."

She turned slowly, opening her eyes resignedly. Of course, he was wearing a tank top that was already half soaked with perspiration, a towel slung lazily around his neck. The cropped stretchy pants that he wore for his classes did nothing to hide his muscular thighs and Clarice tried to keep her gaze at eye level. The key word being tried.

"Hi John."

With another parting grin, he turned back to continue his class.

Lorna jabbed Lauren in the side, causing the younger to pipe up, "I am not changing shifts with you, Clarice." They both grinned at her again.

"Could you hand me that appointment book please?"

"Gonna bash your head in with it?" Lorna drawled.

"...Yes."

"Need my help?"

Clarice laid her head out on the counter, face turned towards the yoga studios. John waved at her from inside, even as he demonstrated a deep breathing exercise. She lifted her hands in a tiny wave in return, watching his broad chest rise and fall. "Please."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> would you faint during a yoga class with john proudstar? i would.
> 
> tumblr: [here](http://ltfrankcastle.tumblr.com)  
> twitter: [here](http://twitter.com/ltfrankcastie)


	2. two.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You generally have to befriend your colleagues, or defend them from other people; it's just good manners.

John shouldered his duffle bag as he walked down the street towards the gym, hunching his shoulders a little against the wind that had just picked up. Mentally reviewing the classes and routines that he had for the day, John didn't notice the ruckus that was taking place outside the main gym entrance until he was almost on top of it. Which was kinda surprising, because it was real loud.

It had seemed that Clarice, as part of her duties, had been handing out flyers and talking to people about their gym programmes, in a bid to get them to sign up and try some. Simple task really, they all did it from time to time. It wasn't difficult, people either brushed by you without looking, listened for a bit without interest or enthusiastically picked one class to hear more about.

Of course, you also got your weirdos once in awhile.

Clarice was currently locked in a screaming match with a man, who was towering over her petite frame, but she had no problems getting all up in his face, even in such a situation. His heart stuttering in a mild panic, John quickened his pace into a small jog, intending to get between them before Clarice got hurt. His bag was tossed onto the sidewalk by the door and he was getting ready to storm in when Lorna put a small hand on his shoulder, stopping him.

"She's got this."

"What happened?" John forced his hands to relax. He had an instinctual protective nature that he'd never been quite able to turn off. The urge to run in and yank Clarice out of the fight was still burning in his veins and John made himself regulate his breathing until it was back to normal. There was an uncomfortable ball of worry sitting in his gut. It was killing him to ignore it.

Half the team on shift at the gym were also peering out of the door or windows to watch the show.

"Some asshole decided he could grab Clarice's ass just because she's out there in a tank top and training pants on the street," Lorna shook her head. "I don't know if I want to kill him or feel sorry for him."

"He - what?!"

Lorna glared at him, "Calm yourself, Proudstar. You go running in there now, and you'll be the one Clarice will be screaming at."

John blinked, unsure of how to react to that. Lorna smirked, "The princess doesn't need a knight in shining armour this time."

But then suddenly, it didn't matter anymore. Because Clarice now had the man, who was clad in a business suit mind you, in a chokehold, with his arm twisted around his back. "Say it!"

"No, bitch!"

"Say you're sorry!"

"No! You put your ass out there, I'm gonna grab it. It's a free country!"

Clarice leaned in closer, spitting out her words from behind clenched teeth, "You see all the people I work with watching us fight in the street? I would beat your ass to high heaven, and every single one of them would swear that you hit me first."

"You bitch."

"You pervert!"

"Alright, I'm sorry!" The man rubbed his arm a couple of times as Clarice let him go, grimacing in disgust. She stepped towards Lorna and John, a twisted expression on her face. The flyers she had been handing out were blowing away in the wind now, but it was a lost cause. No one bothered to even move to pick them up.

John reached out to grasp her elbow, only now noticing that she was trembling. Just barely, such that it was only noticeable because he was the closest to her. The ball of worry in his gut grew to contain mild panic as well. His only thought was to get her into the gym, where she would be safe with friends, and warm away from the cold.

But a small movement out of the corner of his eye made him turn, itching for a reason to throw a few punches. It was amazing. The man actually had the audacity to sneer after Clarice, making a rude hand sign, even in front of everybody still staring at him with poorly concealed murder in their eyes.

Unbelievable. Barely containing his own anger, John bared his teeth in a fierce snarl before drawing himself up to his full height, and smirking a little as the man blanched and scurried away. 

When he turned back, Lorna was smiling at him, like she knew a secret. But then it was wiped off her face as she took Clarice's other side and ushered her into the gym, murmuring to her in a soft voice.

He put the nasty business out of his head, and turned his attention back to Clarice, "Are you okay?"

"I wish I could have gone to town on his ass," she shook her head, rubbing at her arms and hugging herself. "Prick."

"Does this happen often?"

Lorna shook her head, taking the glass of water Lauren handed to her and passing it to Clarice, "First time I've known about it. Drink."

Clarice was still shaking. But now she was literally shaking, to a point where more people were noticing it. He was getting pretty concerned, and the ball was still growing. John ducked his head to look at her, searching in her eyes for any sign of distress, "Clarice, are you sure that you're okay?"

"Actually, I think I'm about to hit the floor."

The gym erupted into a cacophony of sound.

John cursed loudly as he quickly grabbed the glass of water from her and set it aside before too much had spilt. Throwing an arm around her back, John's arms were suddenly taking her entire weight as her knees gave out. She sank to the floor, shaking. There was shouting around him, so much shouting. Someone threw a blanket over Clarice's shoulders.

John had been the closest, and she gripped his other hand hard, hanging on for dear life. Her breaths were shaky and uneven and her eyes were glazed over. Ignoring the roiling in his gut, John shook her a little to get her to look up at him. This he knew how to handle.

"Clarice, look at me, deep breaths. Count with me, in, one, two, three, four, five."

Lorna backed everybody up, ushering them back to their duties, as she kept a worried eye on the pair on the ground. John was afraid that if he looked away from Clarice at this point that she might pass out from hyperventilating. Rubbing at her cold hands, he struggled to keep his voice even, and continued, "Out, one, two, three, four, five."

Clarice leaned her head back against the staff counter, struggling to breathe along with John's measured counting. Panic attacks were not common for her, and honestly, she liked to think she wasn't the sort of person or female to freak out when something happened.

"You just went through something traumatic, it's perfectly normal to react like this."

Clarice blinked at his response, unaware that she'd spoken out loud. Huh.

"Yeah, you said that out loud too," John was smiling slightly, his worried eyes still scanning her. "Your breathing's evened out though. That's good."

With an unusual surge of bravery that Clarice later swears was due to the lack of oxygen that her brain was suffering from, she finally released his hand from her death grip, reached forward and poked his chest, "Now that I'm breathing okay on my own, you can stop doing your deep breathing exercises now. This is distracting me."

John spluttered and erupted into bewildered laughter, and it had his shoulders shaking. Opposite her, he sat down heavily, still laughing as he kicked his legs out next to hers. 

Clarice crossed her arms shakily, wrinkling her nose as she waited for him to stop. Which he eventually did. After five minutes.

"You done?"

"Oh yeah," John coughed, resting an elbow on a raised knee as he regarded her. "You better?"

"Not sure, but I think so."

"Good," he smiled at her. Clarice felt her stomach do a little flop and she struggled to keep her face expression neutral. It wasn't fair. He wasn't even doing anything remotely close to showing off his amazing body. John was just smiling. And yet, she liked it. Very much in fact. 

She shook herself out of it, remembering where she was and why she was here in the first place. "I have classes," Clarice looked at her watch, her eyes widening just a little.

"Oh, yeah, that's right. Class," John's face fell just a little before lifting back up again. He got to his feet, holding out a hand to help her up.

His pull brought her a little closer to him than Clarice had expected. Her breath caught as he reached to steady her, as he had done before when he was leading her in. Reeling, she took a hasty step back to put some distance between them and dropped his hand. It wouldn't do to mess up her head again. 

"I gotta - "

"My bag is still - "

They laughed, and Clarice stepped aside to head in for her classes.

"You sure you're good?"

John was still in the same spot, looking after her uncertainly. His hands were clenching and unclenching by his side. _What was that about_ , Clarice wondered. She was still a bit shaky in her steps, but locked her knees to keep from falling again.

She pasted what she thought could pass for a smile onto her face, "I'm good."

"Okay."

-

Clarice closed her locker and shouldered her bag, stepping out of the staff room. She waved at Lauren as she passed the counter, zipping up her jacket over her tank top now that it was cooler outside. And if she was doing it because she was still a little bit shaken up over the incident in the morning, there was no one to tell on her but her. 

Lorna gave her a hug, squeezing her tight before letting her go, "You call me or Marcos, if you need anything at all, okay?"

"Lorna," she said exasperatedly. 

" _Anything_ ," Lorna stressed. "I'm serious. My phone will be on all night."

Clarice would honestly die before calling Lorna. All of her life, it had been about not being a burden to anyone, not since she had managed to get out of the foster system. Lorna knew about Clarice's reluctance to depend on anybody. But looking into Lorna's concerned face, she could hardly say any of that.

She nodded, and clutched her backpack strap tighter as she turned towards the door. It was strange really, how one incident could make something so insignificant as the street seem so different.

"Come on, I'll walk you home. You live a few blocks from here right?"

Clarice turned at the low voice, looking up surprisedly at John, who was staring resolutely ahead and most definitely not at her.

It was also getting increasingly difficult to ignore the growing grins on Lorna and Lauren's faces. 

"You don't have to - "

"It's fine, it's on my way home anyway," John pushed the door open, finally looking back at her as he held it ajar. "Come on."

She bit at her lip. As much as she hated relying on anybody, it would be nice to have some company on the way home. It was John. He was probably going to scare off everybody just walking down the street with the sheer size of him. Just once couldn't hurt?

Determinedly ignoring the familiar flop her stomach had just done, Clarice walked past her friends without glancing at them. He was just doing this to be friendly, she told herself. John was just protective by nature. And it was on his way home.

Still, it did feel nice that he'd offered.

She stepped outside. John closed the door behind her and off they went.

Back in the gym, Lorna smacked the open palm Lauren held out to her in solidarity, the pair of them still sporting identical grins on their faces.

Marcos emerged from one of his solo client sessions, wiping at his neck with a towel, "Why are you guys smiling like that?"

"John just offered to walk Clarice home," Lorna pointed in the direction the pair had gone. "I think he was worried about her."

"They went that way?"

"Mhmm."

"But doesn't he live - "

"Yep."

"And that's way out of his - "

"Mhmm."

It took him thirty minutes.

Lauren let out a peal of laughter at the sight of John walking past the gym again. Marcos and Lorna scoffed as he rolled his eyes at them, heading in the opposite direction that he'd had walked Clarice home in.

 _Not a word_ , he mouthed at them through the glass.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> subscribe and comment for a chance to win a free class with john proudstar! i kid. 
> 
> tumblr: [here](http://ltfrankcastle.tumblr.com)  
> twitter: [here](http://twitter.com/ltfrankcastie)


	3. three.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where was the fine line between co-workers and friends? And how did you know if you've passed it?

"So - ," Clarice jumped as Lorna sidled up to her behind the counter. "How was your walk home yesterday?"

"Jeez, you're going to give me a heart attack, and then where would you be without me?" Clarice hid her face behind her curtain of purple hair, biting her lip to keep from smiling. There was absolutely no reason to smile, it was just a walk home between platonic friends. And yet she was smiling anyway. Dammit.

"Literally nothing would change," Lorna drolled, tapping her metallic green nails on the book. "Maybe I'd have a fellow instructor who wouldn't hide out at the counter to watch the yoga classes happening all the time, but other than that, nothing much else."

Clarice would smack her for that comment, but she was distracted by John pushing up into a shoulder stand in the yoga studio, and her eyes focused on the scene behind Lorna as he held the pose for a few seconds before dropping slowly and gracefully onto his back.

A snap of fingers in front of her face brought her back to Lorna's gleeful smirk. "What?"

"How was your walk home yesterday?" Lorna repeated, the smirk never leaving her face. She handed out towels and water bottles to a customer before returning back to Clarice. "Was there a romantic tension between you guys?"

"There was a homeless man who asked us for change, if you're asking for interesting things that occurred. Other than that, pretty much the same."

Lorna snorted, "If by same, you mean having a tall, well-built man with a kind heart and broad shoulders walk you home, then sure, same."

"I don't know what you want me to say, Lorna."

"You can't tell me that you just walked home in silence," the roll of her eyes was so dramatic Clarice almost laughed. But that laugh would have cost her, so she wisely kept her mouth shut.

Of course they didn't walk home in silence. Wouldn't that have made for an awkward walk home? Clarice lived about twenty minutes away from the gym on foot. It was so near that she simply preferred to walk everyday to save on bus fare. Besides, saving a little goes a long way right?

Sure, the walk had been quiet at first. That was because Clarice still reeling from the fact that John Proudstar was walking her home. He just lives in this direction, she told herself, it's just a friendly thing to do. She kept her eyes forward resolutely, knowing full well that if she let herself be distracted by the way his broad chest filled out the tee he was wearing or the way his longish hair was scraped back into a small bun, she might walk into traffic.

Knowing this man though, he'd probably swoop in and save her before a car hit her. Maybe she should try it.

"So have you been at the gym long?"

"Huh?" Clarice could have hit herself if she didn't already know John would laugh at her.

But laugh he did anyway. "I said, how long have you been working at the gym?"

"Just coming up on two years," she shrugged. "I didn't really fit in anywhere else."

"I find that hard to believe. Everyone at the gym loves you."

John was just so earnest, she could cry. He was literally the most sincere person on the planet. "Have you ever not been nice to anybody in your life?"

He blinked, taken aback by the question, "I don't understand."

Clarice sighed, "Of course you don't." If the dictionary needed a person to define the meaning of 'kind', it'd probably have a picture of John in it. "What about you? Have you always been into yoga?"

John was quiet for a minute or two, and Clarice worried that she'd overstepped some invisible boundary that she wasn't aware of. "Not always, I was in the Marines before this."

"No kidding, I wouldn't have been able to tell with all these muscles," she poked him in the arm, similar to how she'd poked him in the chest after her panic attack. They both laughed as he jumped, surprised by the sudden touch. But Clarice quietened again, biting her lip at the slightly haunted look those words had put in his eyes. "Hey," she touched his arm again, gently this time. "Thank you for your service."

John mustered up a small smile, acknowledging her gesture before clearing his throat and changing the subject, "So why'd you take up boxing?"

Clarice left her hand there for a second more and removed it, recognising that the moment had passed. She shrugged carelessly, "I had anger management issues after coming out of the foster system. Had it too while in the system in fact. My social worker took me to boxing lessons to help me vent all my frustration somewhere and it turned out that I was pretty good at it."

"I didn't - I didn't mean to pry."

"It's alright, you didn't know." It had been so long. Clarice had fought down all the childhood trauma and emotions, locked away in an emotional safe deep deep down. That was a conversation to be had like maybe never.

"Did you compete?" His tone was gentle and Clarice swallowed hard against the rising embarrassment that threatened to colour her face at the concern being shown. She never did well with any consideration thrown her way; more often than not, Clarice had conflated it with pity growing up. 

She shook her head, "Not the competing sort. I don't have the discipline to train. But I do have a certain flair for teaching, or so people tell me. So that's what I do." Sneaking a peek at him, she knocked his arm with her elbow. "You've been at our gym for almost a month now and I still don't know much about you either. How'd you get into yoga?"

Using a hand to scrub at his face and push some wayward strands of hair back, John was again silent for another minute.

"Tell me if I've overstepping."

"No, you're not. It's just - I don't usually talk about this kinda stuff and - "

"You don't have to," Clarice hurriedly said. Of course she would put her foot in it. She shouldn't have asked in the first place. "It was just conversation I shouldn't have - "

 "Hey," a warm hand landed on her shoulder, stopping her mid-sentence. "It's cool, don't worry about it."

Clarice could feel the heat of him seeping through her thin jacket. When he removed his hand, she shivered at the loss.

"I wasn't dealing well with being back in civilian life," his hands were shoved back into the pockets of his sweatpants.  _Oh_ , Clarice thought.

John talked about the mild PTSD he'd suffered coming home, the refusal to talk to anybody who didn't 'understand' what it was like serving overseas, being used to sleeping on hard bunks and showering in cold water instead of soft beds and heated water. If Clarice could take him, wrap him up in a warm blanket, and feed him hot cocoa, she'd want to but it wasn't her place, so she kept silent, trying to be as supportive as she could. A friend had yanked him out of the apartment to his first yoga class, intending for the meditation and slow pace to help calm him down. Turns out it was the best thing that had happened to him since coming home from tour. And in true dedication, he'd honed his skills until he became a certified instructor.

Stopping mid-sentence, he looked down at her again, "I'm sorry. I'm rambling."

"No you're not. You're sharing something hard for you, and you're apologising to me? Proudstar, you're too good," Clarice sighed again. What a man.

"Oh, we're going by last names now?" A ghost of a smile played around his lips. "Then it's not fair because I don't know yours."

Her chest clenched, remnants of a family that she never knew and never would. "Fong. It's - it's Fong."

"It's pretty," John smiled fully now. "And I'm not, really. I'm just, I guess, living."

"Yeah." Somehow, Clarice could understand that.

Both of them with their own experiences and struggles that they'd rather not talk too much about, Clarice felt a kinship growing between her and John. Beyond whatever messy feelings she or her stomach might feel towards him, beyond whatever primal instinct that bloomed whenever she saw him doing yoga; this was a person that understood hardship. And could maybe understand her. 

It was nice.

And it was only a few more minutes before they finally arrived in front of Clarice's apartment block. Turning, she jabbed a thumb behind her, "This is me."

"Alright," he smiled down at her again. 'You gonna be okay?"

For a moment, Clarice had forgotten what had happened to her that day while talking to John. But then it all came flooding back and her expression dimmed a little. Shaking herself out of it, she made herself nod at him. "Yeah, yeah I'll be okay. My roommate's upstairs. She'll take care of me."

"Good," he nodded back at her.

Clarice pressed her lips together, looking off to the side awkwardly as John fidgeted on the spot. 

There was another moment of silence before Clarice spoke again, "So you live around here too?"

"Huh? No, not - here exactly, just in this direction, from the gym. Yeah," John's words tripped out over each other even as he fidgeted a little more.

Clarice cocked her head curiously. John suddenly looked nervous. Strange. "Maybe I'll see you on my way to work some time."

"Yeah, maybe."

She raised her hand in a small wave, smiling again as he waved back at her before climbing the few steps to enter the building, "Bye, John."

"Get a good rest, Clarice."

Smiling, she closed the door behind her, taking a deep breath before heading to her apartment.

"Earth to Clarice," another snap of Lorna's fingers brought her back. Clarice shook herself out of her thoughts.

"I'm okay."

"Must have been a good walk, huh?" Lorna's grin faded a little, catching Clarice's wrist as she reached for her phone. "You are okay, yeah? You would tell me if you didn't feel okay?"

'Lorna, I'm fine," Clarice wrapped an arm around her thin shoulder, pulling her in for a light hug and releasing her almost immediately. Lorna would kill her if anybody else saw that. "Thank you."

Smiling a little, Lorna punched her in the arm before pointing at the group that was milling in the reception area, "Your kids are here."

The happiness that filled her was instantaneous and it showed on her face. Lorna pushed her towards them, also grinning. It was difficult to be upset in the face of such exuberance and enthusiasm.

Clarice pulled her hair back into a ponytail quickly. The kids always made a big deal out of it being purple and wanting to touch it but she didn't want any more distractions than needed.

She didn't need any either.

She did not need lingering thoughts about the way John smiled as he waved goodbye to her yesterday outside her apartment.

Nor should she dwell on the familiar flop her stomach just did after John had spied her through the yoga studio glass and given her a thumbs up.

Dammit.

Clapping her hands quickly, she got the kids' attention, "Alright kids, follow me into our favourite room. It's time for boxing lessons!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let's be real, between thunderblink, i'd date either of them. how could i pick?
> 
> tumblr: [here](http://ltfrankcastle.tumblr.com)  
> twitter: [here](http://twitter.com/ltfrankcastie)


	4. four.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John may not be the only one who notices something is wrong, but he's the only one stubborn enough to do something about it.

Clarice waved goodbye to her last student, who was still sporting a flushed expression from the exercise, and shared a smile with the parent before closing the door. She sighed, rolling her neck and stretching a little. Finally, she was done for the day.

Her watch told her it was close to six. She had some time. 

Still catching her breath, Clarice tightened the wraps on her hands before putting her earphones in and turning up the volume. The fast and heavy beats blocked out all other surrounding sound, especially of the traffic outside. With a loud whoosh, she let out the breath that she'd been holding all day.

It had been a week since the ...  _incident_ and Clarice found herself wondering every day when she was going to be able to let it go. She would be going through the motions of the day like it was a normal day, and then something would happen, and she would find herself flashing back to that horrifying moment of fear and helplessness. That was all she had felt before instinct kicked in and she attacked him.

"Get out," she muttered to herself, walking over to the sandbags hung at the far end of the gym. "Get out of your head."

Losing herself in her music, Clarice brought her fists up to her face, before hitting the bag rhythmically. 

One, two.

One, two.

One, two, and a kick.

One, two.

One, two.

One, two, duck and another kick.

Over and over again, Clarice trained until the sky darkened and the perspiration poured down her face and her back. She had started out strong, but her strength was flagging. With a small cry and a last weak punch, Clarice turned her back on the bag placed her hands on her hips and just breathed for a bit. 

Pressing her hand to her forehead, Clarice closed her eyes, focusing on feeling her lungs with air.

Exhausting herself helped to clear her mind, sometimes. Or at least, it helped her fall asleep easier. To be honest, she had wondered if she was going a little bit crazy. In front of Lorna and the other trainers, she put up a brave front. She didn't want people to worry about her. Fooling people was easy, she's been doing it since she was a teenager. Lorna wasn't completely fooled though, she still caught the side glances when Lorna thought she wasn't looking. Clarice ignored them, or pretended she just didn't notice. She didn't need ... she stumbled over the word pity, fumbled a little and landed on concern instead. She had lived most of her life without anybody watching out for her, and she certainly didn't need to start right now.

No, this was her own private battle.

Whirling around with renewed energy, she lashed out with a high kick, only to let out a loud surprised yelp when John blocked her kick with his strong forearms, blinking rapidly in shock. Her calf ached where she'd made contact with his arms. 

"Wha - what?"

He mouthed something, gesturing to her ears. Clarice hurriedly took the earphones out, reeling a bit as the atmospheric sounds rushed back in, grounding her in the present. 

She wobbled a little on the leg keeping her upright.

"Could have taken my head off with that," he smiled crookedly. "I've been trying to get your attention since I stepped in, but I think you couldn't hear me, what with all the concentration."

"I was in the zone," Clarice shifted her balance uncertainly. He was still clasping her calf between his forearms, perfectly unconcerned as he eyed her. "Um, could you let me down?"

"Oh. Yeah. Sure," John released her in an instant and busied himself with staring at the opposite wall, clasping his arms before him. Clarice lowered her leg hurriedly, self conscious. Once down, she flexed her toes in her shoes, trying to rid herself of the tingling feeling where he touched her. 

There was a moment of silence, which Clarice broke when she asked tentatively, "You were looking for me?"

"Oh! Yeah," John repeated, raising a hand to scratch at the back of his neck. His hair was up in his usual ponytail, but the strands were messier today, already falling out of the band, giving him a rather attractive look. Clarice felt the familiar flop in her stomach, and ignored it determinedly.

Clarice really wanted him to leave so she could continue tiring herself out. She coughed, waiting for him to go on.

"I was just done with classes. Most of the other guys have left, but I was wondering who was still in here. The light wasn't on, but I heard sounds..." He trailed off uncertainly.

"I lost track of time," her answer was swift, with a small smile that didn't reach her eyes.

"Clearly," he smiled again, tilting his head to the side as he considered her now-blank expression. "Everything okay? You were pushing yourself pretty hard there." 

"Everything's fine."

"If you're sure..."

She nodded, "I'm sure."

He studied her for a bit, then said, "Okay then." John shrugged, giving a small wave as he walked backwards, heading for the exit. He had a moment of pause where Clarice was almost afraid he was going to stay, but he kept going. "Marcos is locking up in thirty. Heads up."

"Thanks."

Clarice turned back to the bag, pushing thoughts of John and his ponytail out of her head, fully intent to make as much use of that thirty minutes as she could. She put her earphones back in and rolled her already aching shoulders. 

Time to get to work.

-

When she stumbled out of the showers to grab her things, ears still ringing from the mild but concerned telling off she got from Marcos, she found John standing in the reception area. Her bag was swinging from his fingers, and a smile was gracing his face.

"Come on," he called. "I'll walk you home."

John left no room for argument and simply pushed through the doors, leaving Clarice scrambling to catch up. "Hey!"

He handed her the bag silently once she'd caught up, pretending not to notice the small thundercloud that was brewing over her head, knowing full well that he was probably contributing to it.

They walked in silence for a block. Clarice was arguing with herself internally, torn between yelling at him for being presumptuous yet sweet or crying because she was so tired and he did something nice for her. 

How dare he. How dare he insert himself into where he was not wanted. Clarice was perfectly fine feeling sorry for herself and working herself to the point of exhaustion. She already had Lorna and Marcos and Lauren on her case, she didn't need John adding himself to the equation. 

Stupid John with his stupid nice face and his stupid hair. 

She glared at him out of the corner of her eye. Stupid man with a calm expression walking down the street like she wasn't furious at him. 

Deep inside, Clarice knew she wasn't really mad at John. It wasn't his fault. None of it was. She was just a boiling pot ready to lash out at the nearest human being and it really wasn't fair that it had to be John.

If anything was going to ruin any potential romantic chances with him - not that Clarice was thinking about it, much anyway - this would probably be it.

When she tripped over a crack in the sidewalk and John placed a steady hand at her elbow to steady her, Clarice really felt like she was going to explode out of her skin. She opened her mouth to yell at him for nothing in particular but what emerged was a soft whimper instead. The shame and embarrassment filled her from the top of her head to the tips of her toes.

"Hey, hey. It's fine," he soothed. John had initially been startled. He'd been expecting her to yell not to cry. But he'd shifted into caretaker mode straightaway. "Look, there's a diner just up here. It looks good, let's go in and have something to eat."

"I love this diner," Clarice sniffed, brushing at her face with her hands. She was most definitely not going to cry out in the street.

"That's great," John spread his hands, leaning back against the door to push it open. "You already know what you'll have."

It really was one of her favourite diners. She passed it every day on the way to work, so she was sure John would pass it every day too. The atmosphere was cozy and their cheese fries was to die for. 

He steered her into a booth, taking a seat opposite her and folding his hands on top of the table. Waving a server over, John asked for a cheeseburger and a chocolate milkshake before looking expectantly at her. 

The server made a dismissive motion with her hand, "I know what Clarice gets, which is the same every time she comes in here. What's wrong, honey?"

She shook her head mutely, leaving the server tutting and bustling off to put their orders in. 

"I've never been in here," John looked around curiously. "It looks nice."

Clarice sniffed again, taking a deep breath, "I pass it every day on my way to work. I'm sure you've seen it before too."

"Yeah, well," John shifted uncomfortably, changing the subject hurriedly. "You want to tell me what's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"Sure, nothing. Nothing wrong with beating up a boxing bag and then nearly crying in the middle of the street," John peered at her with large worried eyes, his eyebrows furrowing. He was still waiting for her to take the first step, to talk about what was bothering her.

Clarice opted to stare at the table, focusing on a small scratch in the surface instead. 

"I've been there, remember?" John coaxed at her. "Talk to me, Clarice."

When she still remained silent, John sighed, pushing the errant strands of his hair out of his face. The server pushed his chocolate milkshake in front of him and a malted vanilla one across Clarice's side and he thanked her kindly.

The glass was cool to his touch, and John used that to center himself. Talking about these issues were always hard, but he felt like Clarice needed something right now. He took a deep breath. "Sometimes people just get all up in their thoughts. And it's ... hard to get out of this endless cycle of what ifs or what should have been, even what could have beens."

He took a sip of the rich milkshake, letting the sweetness fill his mouth before swallowing. A sharp contrast to the difficult words he was trying to find. "Dwelling just makes it worse. Dwelling alone, you just sink further into the darkness." John had shared this before, briefly, with Clarice about how he'd lost himself upon returning to civilian life. He knew she'd get the reference.

Clarice's fingers tapped against the glass, her nails clinking against it in something akin to a rhythm. Fast and nervous.

"I won't tell," John said simply. They both knew what he meant. Clarice always tried to keep her privacy, even amongst friends. It took a long while for her to open up to a person. Call it long held fears, childhood traumas, or even just the way she grew up, it became a habit. 

The frustration at her inability to handle the emotions and situation started building up again, and she clenched her fists. Her nails dug into the fleshy part of her palm, radiating stinging pain. 

"I just - " her halting words had John looking at her encouragingly, patiently waiting for her to continue. "I just feel weak, for letting it hang over me. I mean, I beat him," Clarice looked up, her eyes hard. "I won, and I hurt him. So why then do I still feel like the loser?"

His words were gentle in return, "You hurting him doesn't discount the fact that he hurt you in the first place. They don't cancel each other out."

Clarice knew that. _She knew that_. Logically, it made sense. But somehow hearing John say those words made them settle deep within her. There was no familiar flop in her gut as she looked, properly looked, back at him. But as he held her gaze, lips quirking up in a small sad smile, Clarice felt a warmth spread through her body.

Maybe she just needed someone to tell her that it was alright to not be alright.

By this time, their food had arrived and their server - Nancy, Clarice remembered her name now - slid her familiar plate of sausages, bacon and eggs in front of her. The comforting smell settled her, and she managed a weak smile as John nodded, tucking into his burger.

They ate in companionable silence, almost breaking it for a bit for Clarice to steal some of John's fries. He gave them with nary a sound. 

Clarice snuck peeks at him in between mouthfuls. She didn't feel anywhere close to fixed, but she couldn't deny that John had helped untangle at least a large part of the knot that had been inside her for the past few days. The initial attraction, she could deal with. But actually liking the kind, sweet man that was sitting before her, that was going to be another problem.

And it was a battle she feared she was already losing.

John had tossed some cash onto the table before she could even pull her purse out when they'd cleared their plates. He'd covered both their meals and a generous tip.

Clarice had protested, but he had simply shaken his head. Reaching over to grab her backpack off the seat, he slung both his and her bag over his shoulders and strode out, nodding pleasantly at Nancy on the way out. 

Accepting the hug that Nancy pressed upon her, Clarice let herself be enfolded in warm arms and comforting words. "Keep him," Nancy whispered in her ear. "He's a nice boy."

Mumbling something incomprehensible, Clarice escaped outside, hoping the cool air would dull the flush that was starting to rise to her cheeks. She would most certainly not think about that. Not now, when said boy was still offering to walk her home the rest of the way. 

"It's no big deal," he shrugged, already turning in the right direction. "Along the way, remember?"

How could she forget? The first time he walked her home was already seared into her memory. 

They'd arrived at Clarice's building all too quick for her liking, and she was taking her bag reluctantly from him. Her eyes flitted from sidewalk to building to the distance; anywhere but at him. Part of her was still embarrassed that John always seemed to see her at her worst, and the other part of her was worried that if she looked at him now, she would say something that she might have cause to regret.

"If you ever need a sparring partner," John spoke, shoving his hands into the pockets of his hoodie. "I'd be happy to let you beat me up."

The laugh that burst out of her was unexpected. Clarice covered her mouth in surprise, finding that she liked it when John's eyes crinkled up as he smiled. She nodded slowly.

Did John know that the wider he smiled, the further his eye crinkles spread?

"Goodnight, Clarice." John made no movement to leave, waiting patiently for her to enter the building. A small gesture that made her heart feel too big for her chest. 

He made her feel safe.

"Goodnight, John." Before she could think too much about it, Clarice stepped through the doorway quickly, moving to hide her face. She leaned her head against the cool wood of the door, letting out a breath and trying not to think too much about John freaking Proudstar.

Outside, once John was certain that Clarice had shut the door, he turned and quickly walked back the way they came.

His phone buzzed in his pocket, and he pulled it out, wincing as he saw the contact name pop up.

_[9:32pm] Gus: Dude where are you? I've been waiting for you to grab dinner for ages._

John cast a look behind him, watching the light in the third floor apartment come on. Clarice was safe.

_[9:33pm] John: Something important came up._

__[9:33pm] John:_ Owe you pizza._

Shoving the phone back into his pocket, John sighed ruefully, thinking about the tightness in his chest that seemed to happen every time Clarice was unhappy.

Yeah, someone important had needed him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i honestly didn't realise it's been so long since i updated this au. i hope you guys didn't forget me. i promise i didn't forget thunderblink :)
> 
> tumblr: [here](http://ltfrankcastle.tumblr.com)  
> twitter: [here](http://twitter.com/ltfrankcastie)


	5. five.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If they aren't going to get together on their own, maybe they just need a little push from their friends

Clarice took up her usual position at the staff counter, leaning casually against it even as she levelled her gaze into the yoga studio. It was almost like nothing had changed. In true fashion, she was so focused on her task that she didn't notice Lorna sidling up to her until Lorna had slammed her hands against the counter, making Clarice jump with a muttered curse.

"Nice to see you back out here again, sending telepathic thoughts of "I want to bone you" to our resident yoga hottie over there," Lorna stage whispered, poking at Clarice's arm.

Clarice swatted her away with a huff before quickly turning her head to look for witnesses. Clarice breathed a sigh of relief that no one was in the vicinity to hear that. No need to tell the whole world, even if they already knew. But anyway, back to business. 

There was no time for distractions, really. John was getting ready to demonstrate a bridge pose. 

Which was blocked from her view when Lauren stepped in front of her, grinning away like the cat that got the cream. "So things are back to normal then?" Lauren echoed Lorna, and waved a hand in front of her face. 

Clarice smacked it away, mock scowling. Just because they were her friends didn't mean that they should make fun of her all the time. 

It didn't last long though. John caught sight of the squabbling girls through the window, raising his hand in a polite wave. Clarice had to lock her arms around Lorna and Lauren's necks to keep them from waving back too exuberantly.

"Drawing. Attention," she hissed loudly, wincing as John muffled his amusement behind a hand and turned back to his class.

"You're the one drawing attention," Lorna threw her head back, narrowly missing Clarice's forehead and shoving out of her grip. "We're being friendly. You're just self conscious." She adjusted the rings on her fingers absent-mindedly, smirking as Clarice spluttered.

"I'm not - "

"It's wrong to lie, Clarice. You'll be teaching young kids bad habits. Me, for example," Lauren mock sighed, putting her hand on her heart and squealing as she dodged another smack from Clarice. She ducked behind Lorna, sticking her tongue out at Clarice.

"All your bad habits have been learnt from Lorna, not me!" Clarice leaned over the counter to reach at her, grunting when her arms flailed and missed the pair. 

Whatever she may say on the outside, deep down inside, Clarice welcomed the return to normalcy. It seemed like her friends were determined to help her forget the unpleasant incident and make sure that she was alright with it. Honestly, Clarice wasn't completely fine yet... but she was better. And a large part of it was thanks to John.

After their diner dat - dinner, Clarice found herself more accepting of the fact that it was inevitable she would think of the incident sometimes. But that eventually, it would pass. Sometimes she would let her thoughts wander to the horrors he must have seen overseas, and how far he had come since then. John was such a calm and strong person. She really admired him and his determination. She wanted to emulate it. So she busied herself with tasks, training, teaching, talking with her friends. But never exhausting herself again.

Those few days had been hell on her body. Fit as she was, she didn't think she could go through much longer of that.

Turns out all she needed was a sit down session with John.

She had been trying not to dwell on the fluttery feelings that seemed to take over her body every time she was around him. And it wasn't like he had to be shirtless or putting his gorgeous arms on display anymore. It was over the most ridiculous things, like when John smiled at a little kid skipping towards class, or when he held the door open for her and Lorna that day when they were struggling with a huge laundry pile of towels, before stepping forward to relieve them of some. 

Cripes, she was turning into a sap.

And apparently, becoming prone to being lost in her thoughts. Before she knew it, Lorna's elbow was digging into her side as John stepped out behind his exiting class, exchanging pleasantries with Lauren and wiping off his perspiration. 

"Hey, Clarice," he smiled easily, slinging the towel back around his neck. 

"H- hey," Clarice winced internally, loath to look bad in front of John for any reason. She knew full well that she was right on the edge of falling for him for real, and not just for his looks. John Proudstar was a good man through and through. 

She just wasn't sure that she was a good person like him. That didn't mean she didn't want to look good around him though. But looking good next to that god on earth was a hard task. She lifted her head to meet his eyes, finding that he was looking back at her unconcernedly, holding her gaze.

"You guys saw the new thing Marcos is putting in for all the trainers?" Lauren chirped, unconcerned about the charged air between the two. 

Lorna rolled her eyes at the pair, giving up and dropping her head onto Clarice's shoulder. Clarice jolted a little, trying to look at Lauren instead of John re-tying his hair. "I begged Marcos not to make it mandatory, but he's insistent that it will build team rapport and help us bond together," Lorna used her fingers to mimic inverted commas on those last two words, obviously put out. 

"I haven't heard," John said, cocking his head curiously. "Marcos has been really busy lately, is this why?"

"Yeah. We're all going to take turns taking each of the classes the gym offers together, after hours. He wants the team to be closer, and since this is what we're good at," Lauren shrugged. "He figured this would be the best way."

"I voted for pizza and beer," Clarice mumbled, trying not to fall over as Lorna leaned more of her weight on her. 

"I hear mutinous chatter beginning," Marcos emerged from the locker room, fending off Lorna's light smacks and dropping a kiss onto her forehead. "My idea is great. And we'll all get to know the different classes better!"

"Can I assume that you won't be at the yoga classes? I mean I'm just saying - " John barely finished his sentence before Marcos slapped a hand over his mouth, pressing as hard as he could and pushing John backwards. 

"No. More. Stories." Marcos said through gritted teeth, his grin just teetering on a grimace. The girls erupted into giggles at the sight.

Clarice would have stayed to laugh a little harder at the pair, but a student screamed, "Clarice!" and ran pell mell at her to throw her little arms around her waist. She laughed, stumbling back a little. Come to think of it, her students were a big help in making sure she thought of other things than her own issues as well.

As Clarice waved goodbye to the rag tag group, and John ambled off to the locker rooms for a shower, Lorna turned to Lauren and Marcos, a smirk growing on her face.

"What are you up to now, babe?" Marcos knew that look. That look never meant well. Whatever Lorna was planning, it usually involved him. That wasn't going to be pleasant.

"Your idea may not be as bad as it sounds after all," Lorna said slowly, looking thoughtfully at Lauren. "You seeing what I'm seeing between those two?"

"Yeah, no duh."

"Alright," Lorna looked up to make sure both John and Clarice were out of earshot. "Here's what we're gonna do ... "

-

Of course, the first combined trainers class was going to be yoga. Of course it was. If Clarice didn't know any better, she would say that her friends were doing this to mess with her, but apparently there was a whole big deal that Marcos made of drawing lots to see who went first, so.

She dumped her towel and her bottle next to a mat that she had strategically chosen. She'd even arrived early to make sure that she got a good spot. It couldn't be too front and near to John, because she would most absolutely not concentrate on the class. But having a mat too far meant that she wouldn't be able to see him well over the other participants. So Clarice had picked one near the middle, but slightly off to the left, so she could ogle without being too obvious.

Sue her, she'd spent the better part of the night agonizing over this choice. It was a good analysis.

Taking her seat, Clarice folded her legs and rested her arms on it. She worried her lip a little, slightly anxious that she was going to do something stupid in class and embarrass herself in front of John. It had been awhile since she'd done yoga. She remembered the poses, but her posture might not be the best.

Lauren and Lorna walked in, taking seats on the mats next to her. It was weird, they were both just in their sports bras and leggings. Not that the trainers didn't prefer them, but they only usually wore the ensemble in summer, when it was warm. Not right now when it was getting a bit chilly. She herself preferred training in just a sports bra when no clients were around whenever she could.

Clarice looked down at her own tank top and bra ensemble. Something was niggling at her, like she'd forgotten something or that there was something going on that she didn't know. 

"Didn't you hear?" Lorna's expression was smug as she adjusted her towel on the mat. "I bugged Marcos to make it a hot yoga class. He finally agreed to turn on the heat after hours of begging. It's freezing outside!"

The niggling feeling slowly became a resigned feeling as more trainers walked in, sans top. Raising her arms to remove her own - she never was one to deal with the heat well - to help stave off the oppressive heat that was coming, Clarice knew full well what was coming. And there he was. John walked in clad only in some stretchy yoga pants, tying his hair back, his nice chest very much on display.

She could honestly hear hearts throughout the studio stuttering and failing as John took the towel off his neck and clasped his hands together, starting the class. Her heart was probably one of them. Clarice could already feel some heat rushing towards her cheeks as she watched John roll out his shoulders while addressing them.

Clarice aimed her eyes heavenward, ignoring her friends next to her who were trying to get her to pay attention. This was going to take a lot of willpower. Both to ignore John's very attractive body to focus on the class, and to ignore her two friends next to her raising their eyebrows and gesturing towards their very attractive teacher.

Truth be told, Clarice thought she did relatively well, paying attention to the flow of the poses and the maintaining of posture rather than to John. She managed to hold most of them, pleased that she'd retained muscle memory from her brief stint on the yoga mats. She barely faltered through John holding a very stable crow pose, his strong arms holding himself off the ground. Clarice was just glad she didn't faceplant into the mat, realising that she could lift herself up into the pose for a few seconds before dropping back down. Better than Lorna, who yelped and tipped over to the side.

"This yoga shit is hard," she grumbled under her breath, causing Clarice to giggle. "No wonder Marcos lied about breaking his nose."

Speaking of which - "Where is Marcos?" Clarice whispered back. She grabbed at her towel to mop at her forehead. The yoga studio's heating elements were top notch and everyone else was practically dripping with perspiration. Now she wished she'd brought a bigger one.

"Off running errands," Lorna said while rolling her eyes. Clarice took that to mean that it was an excuse for Marcos to not be in the class to embarrass himself further. There had to be a longer conversation amongst themselves one day on how to make Marcos take a class. She bet Lorna and Lauren would be on board for that. John too.

Turning her attention back to the class, Clarice dropped back into a downward dog, flexing her calves as her heels strained to touch the ground. She let her eyes close, revelling in the stretch and burn in her muscles. It was a good change from her own classes, which focused more on power and strength. Taking some time to calm her mind and simply stretch out all the soreness in her body was good for her. The heat helped too, loosening and warming up her normally taut muscles.

So distracted in her thoughts was she, Clarice jolted when a pair of hands found their way to her waist. 

"Hey, it's just me."

Hating herself for it, Clarice knew she would recognise that voice anywhere. And to think, she had nearly made it to the end of the class without embarrassing herself too.

John continued, "You have to just shift your weight backwards a little bit more, to stretch out your back and shoulders. It'll ease the strain on your calves too." With the gentlest of pressure, his fingers eased her backwards into the pose. "That's right. Hold it there."

Clarice felt the loss of warmth when his hands left her waist, and struggled not to lose her balance or her focus. Next to her, Lauren's mouth had fallen open watching the scene. 

"You're gonna drool on the mats," Clarice said simply, ignoring her friend with utmost determination. 

The rest of the class passed in a blur, and before she knew it, the namastes were said and people were picking up their stuff and leaving class. Clarice crossed her legs, wiping at her face with her towel while laughing at Lorna, who was lying spread eagled on her mat. 

"I can't get up," Lorna groaned, ignoring Lauren who was trying to pull her to a sitting position. "You guys are going to have to carry me out."

"I can't even carry myself out right now," Lauren held her waist with one hand and Lorna's hand with the other. "I don't think I'm cut out for yoga, you guys."

Clarice shook her head at their antics, "It's not that bad. You guys are just being dramatic."

Lorna opened her mouth to retort but shut her mouth quickly when John stepped up behind them. 

"You guys doing okay?"

"I think you killed me. You're going to have to answer to Marcos," Lorna let go of Lauren's hand and flopped back down to the floor. Opening an eye to peek at John, Lorna scrunched up her nose as he laughed at her. "You laugh now, Johnny boy. You wait."

"I'll be sure to watch my back," he mock-saluted her. 

Clarice sat quietly, wondering if she was wishing for John to address her or for them to stop talking so she could leave the studio to avoid a shirtless sweaty John. Her stomach lurched as John did turn to her, " Clarice, could I have a moment?"

She looked around confusedly, "Yeah?"

"We'll leave you to it," shocking everyone, Lorna shot to her feet and gathered her things in record time. She pulled Lauren after her, and they left the studio in a flurry, leaving the pair of them blinking in the aftermath. Clarice shook her head. Lorna was many things, but subtle was not one of them.

Neither was camouflage, since she could clearly see them peeking in from the staff counter.

"What's up?"

"I just wanted to make sure that I didn't scare you earlier in the class. I usually try and adjust my students to make sure they don't hurt themselves or they get the most out of a class," John lowered himself to the mats in a crouch position to match Clarice's eyeline as he rubbed at his neck awkwardly. "I forgot that you might not want people to touch you at the moment, and I forgot to check in with everybody if that was going to be okay."

Clarice stared blankly for a few seconds, wondering what he was trying to get at before it clicked. John thought that she'd flinched because she was still wary of the incident that happened two months ago. She felt oddly moved that he was concerned about it and a tinge of embarrassment that the flinch was actually due to her attraction to him rather than anything else.

"No, I - " she swallowed the small outburst, calming herself before speaking further. "I wasn't scared. You didn't do anything wrong." Finding a small kernel of courage and overwhelmed with the need to reassure him, Clarice reached out to pat his knee. A small hysterical part of her noticed that his yoga pants was made of a very nice soft material, and she made herself take her hand back. "I was just too focused on the class that's all."

"Yeah?" John gave a small laugh. "That's good. I just wanted to make sure."

They lapsed into a slightly awkward silence. John rocked back on his heels, pressing his lips together as Clarice tapped her fingers over her thigh nervously.

"So how did you find the class?"

"Oh. It was good. You're a really good teacher. I had fun," Clarice rambled on a little, slightly distracted by the drop of perspiration making its way down John's collarbone. She really had to get out of the studio to keep from just lurching over and - "I should - "

"Yeah, don't let me keep you," John got to his feet in a small bounce, holding his hand out to Clarice. She hesitated for a bit, before reaching to take it. Her own hand felt so small in his large one, and he pulled her to her feet in a swift motion.

They ended up barely an inch apart, so strong was his pull. Clarice sucked in a sharp breath, not really prepared to be so close to him given her latest discovery that her attraction to him may have progressed beyond the physical. John took a deep breath, looking down at her for a moment before shaking himself out of it and stepping back. 

As he moved out of her space, Clarice felt like her head cleared and she could think properly again. But she craved that intimacy, craved that closeness. She wished she could be that close to him and not have to worry about what he or other people thought. A guy like him was sure to have girls lined up outside his door. He wouldn't like someone like her with so many issues.

Releasing her, John shook his head, "Sorry about that."

"It's - it's no problem."

John handed her the rest of her things silently as he picked up his own and they left the studio, heading straight for the locker rooms and each turning towards the opposite ends. Silence reigned in the gym again.

At the staff counter, Lorna was maddeningly close to pulling her hair out, only to be stopped by Lauren. "They're so stupid!" Her fingers curled around the green locks, yanking at them even as Lauren pulled on her wrists frantically.

"You're not going to get any argument from me, but your plan is not going to be helped by you having to get hair replacement therapy! Stop it!"

Lorna dropped her hands sulkily, "Well my plan failed, didn't it?"

"We obviously didn't them push them far enough. What's next on Marcos' staff bonding plan?" Lauren crossed her arms, sighing. "They obviously like each other. Or are attracted enough to each other to bang at least."

"I have no idea, but I'm sure we'll figure it out," Lorna pinched the bridge of her nose, already coming up with ways to interrogate her boyfriend. "One way or another, we are going to get those two oblivious idiots together."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i promise you i haven't forgotten about my fics. work has been crazy busy. also what about that s2 fall finale i'm still yanking my hair out cripes
> 
> also where did all the thunderblink fans go is everyone is hiding after that ep? comments would be love i need to make more thunderblink friends
> 
> tumblr: [here](http://ltfrankcastle.tumblr.com)  
> twitter: [here](http://twitter.com/ltfrankcastie)


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